


He Loves Him More

by kotabear24



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Domestic Violence, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-28
Updated: 2012-10-28
Packaged: 2017-11-17 05:01:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/547886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kotabear24/pseuds/kotabear24
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The one where Harry and Louis used to be a thing, but now Louis' with Eleanor and Harry's with Nick, until Louis' not really with Eleanor and Nick notices and gets jealous and it becomes a problem.</p>
            </blockquote>





	He Loves Him More

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry! First time writing nick/harry and it's violent, omg.

It wasn’t supposed to be like this. Harry and Louis were supposed to break up until the second album came out, and actually try to move on and live, and it was working until Louis started seeing Eleanor, but then it was alright again because Harry met Nick, and.

And see, the thing is, Nick is great. He’s smart and funny and charming and attractive and older and more experienced and he doesn’t fangirl or anything but he still manages to be a fan of everything Harry ever does. And so that makes Harry feel really good – that someone like Nick Grimshaw, who has all these fabulously rich and famous and attractive friends, is interested in Harry. He’ll bring Harry out with him and his friends for drinks and things, and his friends all like him, too, and they’re nice to him and they laugh at his stupid jokes and they buy him drinks and shrug when Harry says lame things like, “No, thank you; I don’t smoke” instead of laughing in his face and calling him names like his friends in school always did. And – and even with all of his friends around, Nick still focuses most on Harry. Nick pays attention to Harry over Pixie and Florence and Taylor and Kate and Caroline and Rita and Christ, it’s so flattering and makes Harry so happy that he keeps Nick’s attention like that, because that’s something Harry could do with Nick that he sometimes couldn’t with Louis. Because Louis is so easily distracted, and sometimes Louis looks at him like nothing but him matters, but sometimes Louis is too caught up in the other people making noises or movements in the area that Louis forgets to focus on him and pay Harry any attention. Nick doesn’t ever forget. Nick is always paying attention, and it’s so good.

Until then, Louis and Eleanor aren’t spending as much time together and they don’t look as happy together as of late and there are rumors of a break-up impending and Nick takes notice, and even though Louis is too good of an actual friend to Harry to ever mess with Harry’s happiness – because Harry really is happy, with Nick – Nick doesn’t like it, and it makes Nick pay even more attention, and it’s not always very nice.

Now, Nick sometimes gets jealous. And Harry had thought it was cute at first, because by now, Nick knows enough that Harry really is in love with Nick, would do anything for Nick, wants only to make Nick happy and wants Nick to keep loving him forever and never ever be angry with Harry or be sad because of Harry, and yet, here is this big green-eyed monster of jealousy whenever Harry goes on tour, or whenever another video comes out of Harry cuddling with Louis, or looking at Louis intensely. And at first, Harry would kind of push it, just a little, not enough to upset or confuse or lead Louis on, because the last thing Harry wants is to be in love with Nick and make Louis think that Harry wants to leave Nick for him, because – well – he loved Louis, and Louis was great, but that was over and done with and it had been Louis’ suggestion and Harry doesn’t have any grudges or regrets, honestly, but Harry’s a one-person man, always, and he doesn’t want to upset Nick or upset Louis, because now he loves Louis as his best mate and he loves Nick as his boyfriend-and-more-because-Harry-loves-him-that-much.

So Harry kind of pushes it, just a little bit, at first, thinking he could get a bit more sex out of his now-jealous boyfriend, but – well – that had ended badly.

Like, now, Harry has rules.

And, well, not to sound like a diva, or anything, but – Harry is Harry Styles, and he’s not used to having rules anymore. The closest thing to rules he’d had in the past few years had been sex “rules” whenever Louis had taken over in the bedroom, or common sense rules made by management – things like ‘don’t get caught, Harry and Louis’ or ‘don’t get anyone pregnant’ or ‘don’t swear at or be rude to any fans, because they don’t like rude people and won’t buy your music’ – and, well, Harry doesn’t like having rules.

So at first, he breaks the rules, just a little. Not enough to really make Nick angry or upset or worried that he was losing Harry, because Harry loves Nick; he just doesn’t love rules.

But then, once the rules are set in place, Harry quickly realizes that the rules aren’t actually flexible, no matter how much Nick loves him or how much he loves Nick. Because Nick really doesn’t like Harry breaking rules and seeing Louis.

Like, at all.

But thankfully, Nick realized that Harry and Louis had to be together, at least for work, and Nick was sweet enough to at least adjust that rule a little: Harry had to have his phone in his pocket or in his hand at all times when he was with Louis, and he was not to be alone in a room with Louis, regardless of if he had his phone or not – which, Nick had made clear, Harry had better have his phone on him – and Harry was to keep away from Louis as much as possible without making anyone suspicious. Nick was sweet, like that.

Only, sometimes, Nick and Harry don’t really agree on what ‘away from Louis as much as possible without making anyone suspicious’ entailed, and Harry will come home from a night out with the band and Nick will have had seen a shaky, dusty, sketchy camera-phone photo of the band, smiling with their arms around each other’s waists, and did Harry really have to stand next to Louis in this photo? And Harry would try to explain, but sometimes Nick would get so jealous because Louis was clearly using that photo as an opportunity to be close to Harry and seduce him and tear Nick and Harry apart, and it didn’t matter that Louis hadn’t stood next to Harry for the rest of the night after the photo, because Louis’ plan was obviously to sucker Harry in slowly, gradually. And if Harry would talk back to Nick, and insult his intelligence, and Jesus, why doesn’t Harry just call Nick stupid, while he’s at it?, then Nick would get angry because one of two things was clear: either Harry was saying Nick was stupid and wrong, or Harry was cheating on Nick with Louis and being a whore and trying to keep both men.

And he would tell Harry how hurt he felt, seeing those photos, because it’s bad enough that the world didn’t know Harry was Nick’s, but honestly why couldn’t Louis just respect their love?

And sometimes Nick would get so upset and sad and angry and crushed that he would snap, just out of nowhere, and sometimes he would put his hands on Harry and sometimes Harry wouldn’t like it, but Nick was so upset that he would hurt Harry. And then he would leave Harry, bruised and crying on the kitchen floor or dining room floor or living room coffee table or leaned up against the front door. Sometimes, Nick would be too angry to come back for a whole hour, and Harry would be wracked with pain and guilt that he’d hurt Nick that badly, that he’d been so bad for Nick and it had made Nick into something Nick had never wanted to be, and it was all Harry’s fault.

And then Nick would come back, and he’d pick Harry up and take him to the bedroom and kiss him and cuddle him and rock into him and use his mouth and gentle fingers, and cry because it wasn’t right, it wasn’t right to do what he’d just done. And Harry would cry, sometimes, too, and apologize for having been so bad, and so hurtful, and he’d forgive Nick every time the man apologized, and Harry would kiss him and pant out reassurances, it’s okay and I deserved it; I’m so sorry for making you so sad and I don’t know why Louis doesn’t know I’m yours, but I’ll tell him, I swear and I love you.

And Harry would know that Nick meant it that time, and he would fall asleep with Nick’s arms wrapped around him, and he was safe and glad because Nick still loved him, and he would promise himself to tell Louis the next day that he was Nick’s, now, and that Louis needed to stop trying to seduce him because he was disrespecting Nick and his relationship with Nick, and Harry wasn’t going to stand for it.

It wasn’t supposed to be like this. Harry was supposed to wake up in the morning and put makeup over the new bruises, along with the old ones, and put on clothes to cover up everything he could. He was supposed to go into work and quietly tell Louis to back off because Nick was upset. And it was going so well, he’d done everything else – except now, Louis has his pressed against the fridge in the break room and he’s kissing Harry with soft lips that don’t feel angry or threatening or even apologetic the way Nick’s have begun to feel always, and – oh – it’s really nice, that.

But then Louis’ hand slides down Harry’s arm and grasps at his wrist, and – ouch – that doesn’t feel nice. Harry breaks from the kiss and flinches from Louis’ grasps and he remembers what he was supposed to tell Louis and he starts to say it – “Nick doesn’t like you trying to seduce me, so please-” – but then Louis is grasping his wrist again, and this time, Harry gasps as the wave of pain rolls up his arm.

And then Louis is grabbing Harry’s hand and pushing up his sleeves and – well – then he sees everything. “Harry,” he barks out, all sharp-like, and oh, Harry forgot that he and Louis are still probably kind of a little bit in love, because when Harry looks into Louis’ eyes, he can read every single emotion in them – and not one of them is pleasant. “Who did this to you?”

“I-I-erm-” Harry stutters out as he tries to pull away from Louis, but Louis’ blue eyes are furious as he pushes up Harry’s sleeve more and more bruises are staining his pale skin.

“Who did this to you, Harry?” Louis is nearly shouting now, and Harry can hear the lads in the other room are coming closer, questions echoing through the hall.

“Please don’t say anything,” Harry whispers, terrified, and he wrenches his arm from Louis’ hands and runs out the room, shouldering past the lads, and he’s out of the building in an instant, standing in a small fenced-in area behind the building, smoked cigarettes littering the dirty concrete of it, gasping for air and rolling his sleeve back down, lest anyone else see it.

The door opens behind Harry and Harry’s terrified Louis’ told the lads and they’re all demanding answers, but it’s only Paul, following him casually at a respectful distance because it’s clear that Harry’s having a major freak out but it otherwise alright and Paul probably thinks Harry just needed air, which – Harry gulps in the oxygen, out in London – is true.

Harry pulls his phone out and hits speed dial two – which used to be his mum, but, really, Nick deserved that spot, didn’t he? Harry’s mum wasn’t the one taking care of him anymore, was it?

And then Nick is picking up and Harry is telling him everything that happened, ending with Paul following him out here because he thought Harry just needed air and then Harry telling Nick about the big gulps of air he took before pressing speed dial two. Nick liked to know everything.

And then Nick is sounding angry, and let down, and he’s hissing “how could you be so stupid, Harry” down the line, and Harry is so disappointed and upset and – surprisingly – angry. He’s angry because it’s clear Harry is freaking out and he’s not handling this pressure well and he hates it when Nick sounds angry because it means he’s going to hurt him and then cry and then make it better and it’ll be okay until the next time he sounds angry again, and Harry hates it. Misses when love was easy and physically painless. But no matter how bad he hates Nick, he loves him even worse, so he apologizes a million times and begs Nick for instructions on what to do next.

But Nick isn’t ready for that – he’s hissing things like “don’t let him tell anyone, or they’ll take me away from you, and then what will happen to you?” and things like “they’ll take you away from me and they’ll take away my job and my freedom and my reputation, as if taking you isn’t enough, so don’t let him tell, alright?” and “dammit, Harry, you should have covered those up” and “don’t cry, love, it’s alright, I’m not angry right now, we’ll deal with this at home tonight, yeah?” and “I love you” down the line – and he still isn’t ready by the time Louis opens the door and steps into the fenced area, and looks at Harry.

Harry feels dread and panic wash over him and mix into waves of hysteria and he whispers in a high-pitched voice, “Nick, Louis’ out here, Louis’ here, and Paul is here but so is Louis and what do I do please Nick tell me what to do” but Louis grabs the phone from him and ends the call. And then Louis’ pocketing Harry’s phone and pulling him into a hug, tears running down his face and sobs gently shaking his body. He whispers apologies and says he didn’t know and swears he’s going to save Harry and that Harry has been so good and so strong and that he loves Harry and that he’ll get Harry away from that horrible man and that he loves him even more and he’s so sorry that he never realized and that he will protect Harry even more than Paul. He grips Harry hard, but not at any places that Nick’s bruised, so Harry grips back and cries with Louis. Mostly, Harry cries for Nick, because he knows how upset Nick will be right about now, but he also cries for himself because he knows he’s going to be hurt tonight, and he knows he’s going to feel so much hatred for Nick, who is really the only person who loves Harry the very most in the world, and he also even cries a little bit for himself because he knows he’s about to lose Louis as his friend, because Louis will tell someone and Harry will lose Nick and Nick will lose everything he cares about and then Harry will have to hate Louis, and Louis will be the only real thing Harry will have ever hated in his life, because Nick doesn’t really count. Because no matter how bad Harry hates Nick, he loves him worse.


End file.
